In the frenetic pace of your life, do you ever reflect on what attracted you to become a foster parent in the first place? Maybe you’ve had a fire in your belly about fostering since you were a teenager…or a television commercial, social media post, or talk show interview planted a seed that took root way down deep. Everyone has a story.
When a friend or relative asks what motivated you to invite foster kids into your home, what do you tell them? And, digging even deeper, how do you answer when a friend asks, “Why should I become a foster parent?”
The answer is different for each person, of course, but most successful foster parents respond with a combination of these answers:
- I believe I was successful raising my kids and I’d like to use my skills to help others. I believe my parenting experience provides a solid foundation to guide a foster child who has experienced abuse, trauma, and separation.
- I care about children and want to help them. Kids in the foster care system have been abused, neglected, abandoned, and face tremendous obstacles. And I believe foster parenting is a powerful way to support these kids and show them that there is hope for the future.
- I’m compelled to give back; I want to share my experiences, time, and the blessings in my life with a child. I want to use the strength and knowledge I have gained through my challenges to help others.
- I can offer plenty of love, but I’m also able to be firm and strong. While good foster parents need to provide lots of love, I know they also need good parenting and communication skills. I understand that being patient, consistent, and following through on rules and expectations are all important.
- I didn’t have children. By being a foster parent, I believe I’ll be able to share my home and invest my time and attention in a worthwhile cause. I know that children do not come with an instruction manual, but I believe that being open to learning parenting skills with the guidance and support of experienced caseworkers will give me the tools to be an effective parent.
- I understand that there simply are not enough homes for older children and sibling groups. I know that the bond between a brother and sister is one of the longest and dearest relationships a person has in life, so I will be pleased to take on the challenge of caring for sibling groups. I also understand that fostering adolescents can be extremely challenging, but that many teens are hurting deeply, having experienced abuse and betrayal. They need someone to be committed to them and help them succeed.
- As a foster parent, I realize my job is to make this child feel comfortable and accepted in my home. I know that someday the child may leave and that’s okay. I’m aware that the ultimate goal of fostering is usually reunifying children with their biological families. Though I know it won’t be easy to say goodbye, I believe I will find comfort in knowing I have provided a safe home and was able to play an important role in this child’s life
- I don’t feel like my parenting years are over. I love the energy, joy, and excitement I feel while raising children. I find great joy and satisfaction in spending time together with kids, enjoying days outdoors at the park, reading a child her favorite book, and just being there to care. I really enjoy putting my experience to use.
- I want to have a positive impact on a child and community. I see the big picture; I believe that foster parenting goes beyond helping an individual child. Foster parents help fight the problems of homelessness, substance abuse, mental health, domestic abuse, poverty. While caring for foster children, I realize that foster parents give a child’s birth parents the chance to receive help to overcome problems that may have led to the removal of the children from their home
- I’m up for a challenge. I’m excited about the fact that every child has their own unique needs and challenges. And that I’ll get to work with many different people— caseworkers, therapists, doctors, and school personnel. No two days will be exactly alike!
Fostering can be a tough gig, but having the privilege of helping to change the trajectory of a child’s life is nothing short of priceless!
